Have you ever counted yourself out of something before you gave yourself the chance to try?

You read the job posting, land on the one requirement you do not have yet, and quietly close the tab. You walk into the meeting and choose the seat against the wall instead of the one at the table. You wait to be invited into the project, the conversation, the role, because raising your hand for it feels like too much, too soon, too forward. And then you watch someone who hesitated less walk into the seat you talked yourself out of.

I want to be honest with you. I do this too.

That is exactly why my conversation with Kim Ziomek stayed with me long after we stopped recording. Kim has spent her entire career refusing to count herself out, and just as much of it making sure the women coming up behind her stop doing it too. She sits on the board of Women in Manufacturing. She helped create a private, invitation-only group where senior women say the things they cannot say anywhere else. I found her because my husband travels to trade shows, and he brought home a Women in Manufacturing booklet full of remarkable women. I took one look and made it my mission to reach out to as many of them as I could. Kim was at the top of the list, and you are about to see why.

She Stopped Sitting in the Back

Early in her career, Kim was the only woman in a technical meeting, and she had done what so many of us do without thinking. She sat in the back.

Then she stopped herself. She looked around, decided she was done sitting against the wall, got up, walked to the front, and politely asked the men at the table to make room for her.

I remember being the only woman in a technical meeting and sitting in the back, and I went, this is crap. I'm moving to the front.

Kim Ziomek

Sit with how small that moment looks and how much it carries. Nobody kept Kim out of that seat. There was no rule, no closed door, no one telling her to stay against the wall. She had counted herself out of that seat. And then, in one small motion, she put herself back in.

Most of us stop at the first half. We count ourselves out, take the chair by the wall, and call it humility or patience or waiting our turn. That is how a lot of us treat our whole careers. Kim's point is that the table is not reserved for the loudest person in the room or the most senior one. You are entitled to be there because you see things the rest of the room does not.

A seat at the table is not something you wait to be handed. It is something you take.

The Job Description Trap

Here is one of the clearest places women count themselves out, and Kim named it instantly.

A man reads a job description, and even if he cannot do half of it, he applies anyway. A woman reads the same description, finds the two things she has not done yet, and decides she is not qualified. She disqualifies herself before anyone at that company ever gets to weigh in.

Kim's answer is the line I want you to tape to your monitor.

Don't sell yourself short. Push the button and apply for it.

Kim Ziomek

What is the worst they can tell you? And if the answer does come back no, Kim does not read it as a closed door. She reads it as a matter of timing.

And that just means not yet in my book.

Kim Ziomek

The company may be looking for exactly what you bring and fully prepared to teach you the rest. But they cannot choose you for a room you never walked into. Apply for the role. Raise your hand for the project. Let them tell you no, and treat that no as a timeline, not a verdict.

Raising Your Hand Is Not the Whole Job

Here is where Kim and I see the same problem from two sides.

Kim will tell you that women hold back, that we do not raise our hand, and that this is not a personal flaw but something the culture trained into us when we were young. She is right. And raising your hand is the first move.

But I work with women every day who do raise their hands, who do speak up, who are excelling by every measure, and who still get passed over. So I told Kim what I see. These women are doing extraordinary work, and they are not translating that work into the language leadership recognizes and rewards. Kim did not hesitate. She has watched the same thing for decades.

This is what I call the Articulation Gap. It is the distance between the impact you create and the impact leadership recognizes and rewards. Your results do not speak for themselves. They get interpreted, and interpretation runs on the language of metrics, outcomes, and business results. Kim said it plainly: the numbers speak for themselves, so make sure leadership can actually hear them.

And one more thing, because it matters. If you have ever been told the answer is more confidence, reconsider that.

You don't need more confidence. You need more conviction.

Rosie Zilinskas

You are not missing something inside yourself. You are missing the translation.

The Relationships You Build Before You Need Them

If there is one thing Kim does better than almost anyone, it is relationships. Not the transactional kind. The kind that last.

At twenty-six, Kim landed a seat on an industry conference board, which put her in rooms with senior executives decades ahead of her. Those relationships, she told me, facilitated her entire career. They gave her entrée to people she would never otherwise have had the nerve to call. And she did not let them lapse. One of her closest professional friendships started back in 1985 and is still going today.

The majority of my network are not one-off. They are longstanding rapport and relationships. And it makes a difference.

Kim Ziomek

There is a line I keep coming back to.

Networking is a one-off meeting. Collaboration is a relationship.

Most women count themselves out of that second thing, because building a real relationship with someone more senior feels presumptuous. Kim's career is the proof that the relationship is the whole point.

She is also clear that some of her most valuable allies have been men. A good mentor or sponsor sees what you cannot see about yourself, and tells you. Kim calls that pure gold.

It's amazing what others see that you don't see.

Kim Ziomek

Those are your blind spots. When someone who believes in you points one out, they are handing you a map. Do not count yourself out of the feedback by getting defensive. Take the map.

You Cannot Be Seen From Your Desk

Kim's other piece of advice is one I wish more women acted on. Get out of your own building.

She encourages women to join organizations, inside their company and outside of it. Women in Manufacturing. Women in Defense. The Women's Power Network. Inforum. The Automotive Women's Alliance Foundation, which is marking thirty years. The specific group matters less than the act of putting yourself somewhere you will be seen by people who are not your manager.

When you stay inwardly focused, head down, doing excellent work that only the four people nearest you ever witness, you are counting yourself out of every room you are not in. Visibility is not bragging. It is making sure your work has a chance to reach the people who decide your future.

Take the Seat as Yourself

Here is the part I do not want you to miss. Walking to the front of the room does not mean becoming someone you are not.

Kim is firm about this. Above everything, she says, you have to be authentic. You cannot copy the other people in your organization, and you do not have to. You are also not in a race. You do not need the title by a certain year or the salary by a certain age. You pay your dues, you stay yourself, and you let your own timeline be yours.

You have to be you.

Kim Ziomek

I will leave you with my own confession, because it shows how deep this runs. My husband and I were driving through Glacier National Park, all switchbacks and steep drop-offs, and I took the wheel while he slept. I white-knuckled the whole way, drove the minimum speed, and let every single car pass me. When he woke up, I asked if the elevation and the curves worried him at all. He looked at me, genuinely confused, and said no. He just drives. And it hit me. That is exactly how so many of us treat our careers. We second-guess, we slow down, we let everyone pass, while someone next to us simply drives. You are allowed to drive.

What I Want You to Take From This

Taking the seat gets you into the room. It does not automatically get you recognized once you are in it. That second part is my work, and it is where Kim's wisdom and mine meet. You stop counting yourself out, you walk in, and then you translate the impact you are already creating into the language leadership rewards. That is the whole game.

Kim left me with her own three words, and they are a fitting place to end. Communicate, communicate, communicate.

About Kim Ziomek

Kim Ziomek has built her career as a connector. She sits on the board of Women in Manufacturing, where her term runs through 2028, and she helped create a private, invitation-only group that brings senior women together to share their stories and counsel the women coming up behind them. She is also a longtime presence within the Automotive Women's Alliance Foundation, which is marking thirty years.

Across decades in the mobility industry and beyond, Kim has been a catalyst for growth, driving sales results and strengthening brands through relationships built to last. She leads with a look, listen, and learn mindset, keeping the Voice of the Customer at the center of every relationship. Whether as an individual contributor, a teammate, or a facilitator, she gets things done, and she does it by adding value, building trust, and bringing the right people together.

Connect with Kim on LinkedIn